Posted by: sistermom1 | May 13, 2013

Trigger happy?

This journey is teaching me a lot about the power of my own attitude and forcing me to pay attention to how quickly I react to things — or what brings out my more negative attitudes. My reaction to my family, friends, whatever situations I face during the day can feel out of my control and ranges from open and friendly to hostile and angry. In my current experience, I often do not feel in control of myself, but rather like I have been triggered. I appreciate receiving a blog every day entitled “The Daily Love”, and the author shared this with us a few days ago:

Life is not about NOT being triggered. Life is about bringing LOVE and AWARENESS to our triggers and moments when our emotions come up. You see, a lot of people I know make the mistake of shooting for a “spiritual bypass” – where they try to deny their humanness – they try to deny their emotions, they try to put their negativity and triggers in a box – and then pretend they don’t exist. And then – over time – they stack up – and BOOM – you have a breakdown, an emotional explosion or other expression.

Having these doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. It means you are human.

…we [The Daily Love] advocate a full acceptance and expression of your human nature. This lets us be fully alive. From there, we also believe in tapping into the higher awareness that is your Soul, that is the observer of the human mind and emotions. We are part spirit, part human. To deny either is to deny who you are. We can’t sit around and just justify our negativity as “being human”. And we also can’t not express ourselves because we are “spiritual”. We need both. This is the beautiful balance that we get to walk as spiritual beings having a human experience.

We all have triggers. We all have intense emotions, both dark and light. These are not good or bad – they are just information. We must allow ourselves to express ourselves; we must allow ourselves to be FULLY human and FULLY spirit. This dance is the dance that allows the greatest version of life to be lived.

Yes, one thing that this journey continues to be about for me is learning. I continue to learn much about myself, what triggers me, and how to move forward regardless of the triggers. I realize that I am actually here to accomplish significant things — without being distracted by the things that trigger me, including my physical health challenges. Through at-home physical therapy, I am now able to stand with assistance. I also use a standing frame twice daily, which is stretching out my hip flexors and giving me the chance to do some weight-bearing exercises. Although my leg was stuck at a 90 degree bend, my therapist was able to stretch it to 50 degrees! I start outpatient P/T in two weeks, and I look forward to doing more stretching and standing, and eventually — walking!


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