Posted by: sistermom1 | April 6, 2012

Dealing with the Insurance Company

I just spent 2 hours on the phone with our insurance company. Now, I wish I could say that it was an enlightening, encouraging conversation. I cannot. Let’s just say that being on disability is a great thing, unless your healthcare changes and the new one assumes that Medicare is your primary insurance when Medicare insists that your husband’s insurance is your primary.

As a result of this confusion, none of my recent healthcare activities have been covered by either insurance. I thought I was really covered, but not according to either of them.

I started the calls this morning, after learning that my wheelchair application had not been covered by either company.   After much time, and lots of grace and patience (on my part!), I think it is all clear. I do have healthcare through my spouse’s employer, and Medicare is my secondary insurance. Now all of the MRIs, lab work and doctor appointments I have been doing over the past couple of months to manage my health should be covered — at least partially.

Now, all of the pages of notices that have “This is not a bill” printed on them have to be re-submitted.  Now, at least some of the charges will be covered, which leaves me feeling very relieved.  It does make me think about the challenges that all of us with these types of illnesses must deal with — what if I were unable to understand the types of conversations that I had to have to straighten this out?  What if I were single and not covered?  What if we did not have insurance?  There are many “what ifs” involved in my life at this time.  Things are so much different than I ever expected them to be.

Talking about my health often leaves me spent and feeling tired and negative.  Although it is important that I remain on top of things — I was at my pain doctor yesterday who turned up the pump to handle my ongoing spasticity — talking about my health with friends or family often drains me and them.  I find it difficult to help others manage their emotions about my current challenges.  People who care about me hate that I am going through this, but they often do not even realize that how they process their feelings directly affets me.  I can tell when they are at the end of their ability to handle what I have to deal with on a daily basis.   So what do we do?

I am really not sure what we should do about my challenges.  They are not going away — at least not yet.  My determination is to handle whatever I am given — to be victorious no matter what.  Sometimes that is a lot for others to accept and support because it feels like “positive thinking”.  It is much more than that.  How we think about our challenges is a first step towards solving them.  I have been doing more reading and came across a couple of encouraging and exciting perspectives that I have begun to truly embrace.  From a poem by Daisaku Ikeda:

“Faith is -/ To fear nothing/ to stand unswayed/ the power to surmount any obstacle./Faith is the source from which/ all solutions flow.”

And from Wayne Dyer:

“Live from the perspective that all things are possible, planted firmly in the depths of your imagination.  The more you believe in your own Divine nature, the more it starts to become real for you…The only thing you need to learn is that you already are what you are seeking to attain.”

I already am healthy — It is there beneath what I am experiencing in my current reality.  My prayer is focused on manifesting good health now – not as a goal in the future.  This is a very different way for me to approach this illness, but I am definitely embracing it.  I am not worrying about the how or the when — that is not up to me — I am just focusing on manifesting good health in my life every day. Through faith, continued prayer, and wise effort, the reality of good health will manifest in my life.  And dealing with the insurance company will be something in my past…..

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