Posted by: sistermom1 | February 6, 2012

It Has Been A While…

I have not blogged for some time.   It would be easy to blame it on the general spirit/hectic pace of starting a new year.   To be honest, I have been overwhelmed by an infection. It has caused me great discomfort, resulting in a fairly serious exacerbation (in this case, the return of my spasticity). I have not been this tight since before my baclofen pump was implanted in August.   It was definitely the right idea to get it.  With my improvement, I had forgotten how difficult things used to be. I had already begun to take my improvement for granted. After all — I have actually been able to walk in P/T.  Mmmmm — note to self: Check your attitude — where is your appreciation?  What things are you taking for granted, and why?

Coincidentally (is there even such a thing as a coincidence?  I don’t think so!) I had just read one of my favorite MS blogs.  The writer had just had an experience with an infection and she wrote about how it had affected her — physically and emotionally.  Reading it prepared me to take action and get a prescription for antibiotics right away.  (I am halfway through my dose.)  Thank you Nicole!!!!

More synchronicity — I just read the following excerpt from The Breakthrough Experience by Dr. John F. Martini:

“Don’t complain about your lot.  Instead, just ask yourself, ‘How does my illness serve?  What is the hidden benefit to my fear or confusion or lack of money?’  and don’t stop until you’re thankful for it.  Does it make you slow down, seek healing, remind you of your mortality and stop taking life for granted, return to basics and take responsibility for your life?  Does it help you dig inside and find courage, be grateful for small things, humble you, attract help and support, motivate you to get creative and real?  I promise you that the blessing is there, but you must be willing to look for it…. Anything that you perceive as life-threatening or destroying is also life-giving and creating, if you only have the wisdom to look for it.  Find that balance in your world, and enter into a freedom that few people ever experience, the liberty of an inspiring and trusting life.”

Much is going on underneath this experience.  I am determined to find the balance that Martini discusses in his book through my Human Revolution — using the problems and challenges that present themselves as tools to reveal new and deeper abilities that were beneath the surface of my life through heartfelt prayers and positive action. 

According to Daisaku Ikeda, Buddhist writer, philosopher and SGI President, “Human Revolution cannot be pinned down to one specific thing.  It is any action that leads to positive change or improvement in the inner realm of a person’s life.  It is an ongoing process.  The important question to ask yourself is whether you are on a path of continuous personal growth.”

As I continue to ask myself that question, I am reminded of what this detour has presented  — many opportunities to learn, to grow, and to become a more compassionate, stronger woman.  One who just happens to have MS…..

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