Posted by: sistermom1 | November 14, 2010

A Busy Weekend

I totally enjoyed this weekend.  So much happened:

Went with a group of good friends to a matinee of “For Colored Girls”, the new Tyler Perry movie.  What an amazing piece of work.  He really got amazing performances from each of the women he cast in this movie.  Truly one of the best movies I have seen in quite a while.  Heavy, and we definitely needed to talk about it over drinks, but the movie was one of the best I have seen in quite a long time.  Made me think – not only about the experiences I have been fortunate enough to miss out on, but also the fact that I am lucky enough to be partnered with a very good man.

Visited a good friend — I went with two friends to visit a long-time friend, her spouse and her parents.  This friend has had a set of health challenges this year including the onset of a chronic health condition, and a breast cancer diagnosis and mastectomy.  Despite this reality, she is feisty as ever, has a great sense of humor, and her entire family is doing quite well.  Seeing her made me think about my own situation very differently.

Being mindful about my spouse – Being married to a woman with a chronic health condition that limits her ability to move around independently and raising two children with her has got to be as major a challenge for him as it has been for me.  How does he deal with it?  I am sad to tell you that — like most men in our country — he holds everything in and deals with it all internally.  Not always the best way.  Recently, he has agreed to approach this differently, which has made me very happy, and has positively changed the general vibe in our household.

No “E” Zone – Our son is a 9th grader.  He is managing the tremendous shift to high school pretty well, with a few expected bumps in the road.  Our school system uses a grade of  “E” to indicate that the assignment was not turned in on time (if at all).  They also have an electronic grading system that parents can access throught the internet, so we often know grades before the kids do.  This has worked out to our advantage, as our son does not ever lie about his grades (not that he ever did, but who knows what he might be tempted to do since he is older, almost as tall as his father, and dwarfs me in my wheelchair?). 

We have established a “No E Zone” in our household, complete with hand-made signs posted around the house.  This system keeps him honest and communicative, even about the classes that are challenging for him.  I pray to use this as an opportunity to get closer to him, and learn more about him.

This weekend was a great one.  It has been difficult to spend my weekends like I used to — at the mall, at the spa, museums or hanging out dancing with my husband.  Everything I do takes a good deal of equipment, and at least one other person to drive and assemble my scooter.  Being last-minute is not something I can do anymore — planning is required for anything that I do each day, and I am getting used to that.  The point is, I can do things, I just need to do them a little bit differently than I used to do them…. and that’s OK, as long as I still do them.

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