Posted by: sistermom1 | November 9, 2010

Hay House Radio

I have been listening to Hay House Radio for the past few weeks, and it has been amazing.  I highly recommend it —www.hayhouse.com

So much of my experience with MS has come down to a series of choices that my family and I have had to make to live and enjoy our lives happily and comfortably.  We can make these choices consciously, or in a fog, which frankly I have been doing a lot in the past few weeks.  It seems easy to just go along with the flow, rather than making strong, meaningful decisions based in my own truth. 

It has been difficult for me to do this consistently, but I am working hard to always make conscious, positive choices.  Having MS has led me to be much more thoughtful about everything that I do — every decision that I must make.  Many married couples who have faced a life-changing challenge like MS encounter great relationship difficulties.  Some, sadly even get divorced. 

What I have learned first-hand is whatever weak points exist in a relationship (they all have them!) get exacerbated by a major issue like MS, and when they do, you can respond in a couple of ways: avoid the problem, or deal with it directly.  With prayer and love, we are choosing to deal with it directly, a real challenge, but the best way for us to move forward. Divorce is not an option for either of us, but one of the ways we are moving forward is to choose how to make our life together work better for all of us.  So many decisions to make:

Decisions like whether to renovate our kitchen to make it more accessible to me, or move to a new house.  Should I insist that the whole family participate in therapy or should just continue to go on my own?  Should I just take over the grocery shopping online or let my family continue to do it with my (helpful but nagging) comments?  Should we continue with less than ideal cleaning help who also does our laundry or should I try to find someone else who probably will not?  This is some of what we have been considering — but by no means all.

What does any of this have to do with Hay House radio?  I participated in a seminar on Hay House Radio,and one of the speakers was Alan Cohen.  In his lecture, he quoted a poem which left an impression on me then and continues to help me navigate through many of the decisions we are making in our family:

Whenever you are called on to make up your mind/and you’re hampered by not having any,/the way to solve the dilemma you’ll find/is simply by flipping a penny./Not so that chance will decide the affair/while you’re passively standing there moping/But the moment the penny is up in the air/ you suddenly know what you’re hoping.

The coin doesn’t make the decision.  The question is: How do you feel while the coin is up in the air?   While the coin is flipping, what is it that your heart really wants to have happen?  Do you really want one outcome over the other, and if the answer is the opposite, are you disappointed?  Whatever that feeling is — that is the thing you should make happen, regardless of the result of the coin toss.

So, here’s to all of the difficult decisions that are in our pathway forward.  For the really hard ones, I guess I can always flip a coin….

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Responses

  1. Hey Linda, I loved this. We all have done that or my own personal favorite “Dishy, dish, ice cream, dishy, dish out, turn the ice cream inside out… Knowing all along that we have already solved the dilemma or hoping it would end the way we want it to! Thanks for this one. Loving you lots!


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