Posted by: sistermom1 | October 19, 2010

More About Guilty Pleasures

I absolutely love “Say Yes to the Dress”.   Add that to the “Real Housewives of Atlanta”,  “Top Chef”,  and “Project Runway”, and you have my latest list of guilty pleasures (along with “How do I Look”, “What not to Wear”, and the fourth hour of the Today Show).  Seeing people in the act of making a major purchase of a wedding gown, and all of the family dynamics attached to it, is really intriguing to me.  The staff and managers of Kleinfeld are so good at what they do – it is really incredible to see them interact with these clients and their families. (I do love seeing people do what they are good at doing — I guess it comes from spending so much time as a headhunter…

Watching this show (and Four Weddings) leads me to think about the significance of not only the wedding, but the vows that you and your intended make to each other.  My diagnosis of MS has really tested my understanding of  the part about “in sickness and in health”.  My husband and I had no idea what role this phrase would play in our lives when we got married 15 years ago.  As I observe my husband and how he deals with being the spouse of someone with a serious illness, I am reminded how very special he really is, and how important this journey is for our entire family. 

Full disclosure, I was married once before – and that relationship was very different than my current one.  I now truly appreciate having had that experience — even the divorce — because through it I learned many things – including the things I needed to work on to become a better partner.  Since I now need so much support — every day —  that set of lessons has come in very handy. 

This journey would be very different with the man who was my first husband (“Husband 1.0” as my girlfriends would say).   The changes I went through after our divorce really showed me what I needed to change about myself to attract a partner who matched my own list of ideal characteristics and who did not have any qualities on my dealbreaker list (not interested in marriage, has negative relationships with his own family/mother, is unemployed, is not interested in spirituality, is not a good kisser…)

I met my husband (“2.0” as my friends have jokingly – but lovingly – have called him) while we both earned a MBA.  I was so totally not into romance of any kind when I met him, but I was really impressed with his style and his comfort level with making presentations and speaking in front of our class, he completely intrigued me.  When he asked me out for the first time, I was still so not into dating, that my initial response was “How are we going to go out?  We don’t have class on Friday…”  That’s how disconnected I was, but he made it past that and ultimately we became ideal partners for each other.  We got married 2 years later, and it has been a wonderful experience for the past 15 years.

My spiritual pathway has helped me understand more about this entire detour.  Our journey together has been a really unexpected one, but I cannot begin to think about doing it with another person.  I feel very lucky to have such a great travelling partner.  As I write, another of my guilty pleasures — “Chopped” — is on, so I am ending this entry and will write again later!

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Responses

  1. OK, I’m behind on your posts, but I couldn’t let this one go by without comment..hilarious Linda! You hit all my guilty pleasures when I can watch TV. We should start an email check-in called “Girl did you see that____” (fill in the blank) and prepare to discuss. On anther note, congratulations on having a special man that is the right fit at the right time! Continued blessings to you both!


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