Posted by: sistermom1 | October 6, 2009

Today is my husband’s birthday

He golfed with buddies all day. It has been one of those beautiful October days with bright blue, cloudless skies, and temperate climate.  Now, he also golfed on Friday, and went on a four-day golf outing two weeks ago, but I am not trying to be a hater. 

My husband has always enjoyed golf, and it has been a major part of his life since way before we got married.  He enjoys it and it gives him a well-deserved break from the challenges that our current life presents.  Mostly because of my MS diagnosis, our life together has changed dramatically.  He has been required to do so many things for me and the kids that have usually (traditionally?) been my role, and he has done them so well….there is nothing for me to do most of the time.  It really is the epitome of a double-edged sword for me.

It often puts me back in the frame of mind I was in when I wrote about redefining motherhood in a previous blog.  How to be an excellent wife and mother despite the physical challenges that I am now facing.  It is a constant concern of mine – I am never quite sure how well I am doing at either role at any given time.  I try to remember to ask myself the important questions – am I advancing?  Am I happy?  Are my children and husband happy and enjoying their lives? 

They don’t need me to be as involved in every aspect of their lives in the way I have been for so many years.  I am learning how to be a better mother, and a better wife, as my husband marks another year.  I think that one of the best gifts I could give him is for me to chill a bit and release my need for controlling/influencing everyone’s life….I am trying to give him that, along with all my love….

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Responses

  1. I had to laugh at the last sentence in the first paragraph ; )! I remember when I was in college my boyfriend unexpectedly took a trip to The Bahamas the summer before our senior year. Oh and I was hating so much. Then a few weeks before I left to go back to school my mom unexpectedly took me to The Bahamas. She was totally unaware of my feelings when he went on his vacation. When I returned he and I both got a good laugh out of it. I think I even snuck an apologize in. I can remember him saying “See Courtney you never know what’s around the corner.” And that’s so true.

    Now on to you being a wonderful mother ; )! The one time I met your children I could tell that they are very well mannered and truly love you. I work with kids who come from homes that lack love, caring, hope and discipline. I know it’s natural as a parent to worry about your children, but it’s pointless for you to worry about whether or not your MS is affecting the qualtity of your ability to be a mother. The answer is no, it’s not ; )!


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